5.  Everyone who makes a big deal out of all of the bad things that happened on the 19^th and 20^th (Hitler’s birthday, Columbine, Waco, Virginia Tech, Oklahoma City)…get over it people. It’s called coincidence. 

4. It’s distracted driving month, which is asinine. They put up flashing road signs every where, distracting us, with the message “distracted driving kills.” No kidding…maybe you shouldn’t distract us.

3. Easter. Dumbest holiday of the year

2.  4/20. Totally dumb day for the stoners that means absolutely nothing to them or anyone else. Potheads don’t need a date, a time or a reason to toke…they do it because. Period.

1.  April Fool’s Day. Comedy for amateurs.

Honorable Mentions: 

The fact that daylight savings no longer occurs in April. There’s no reason to spring forward in March and fall back In November. Move it back to April and October the way it was meant to be, idiots.

Everything associated with people who wait until the last minute to file their taxes. Seriously? Do we need lines at the post office in 2012? File it online you asshole.

Producer Brandon’s birthday and Arnie’s sobriety anniversary…two things I have to pretend to care about.

There’s no football.

5. The Easter Bunny

4. April Fools Day

3. Earth Day

2. April 20th, you know 4-20 man

1. The stupid HOOPLA around Tax Day including the dancing Statue of Liberty

Honorable Mentions: 

Good Friday
People who have "spng fever"
National Poetry Month