October 20th, 2014 -- Jeff Garlin Is An Idiot
Stupidity bothers me. Perverted stupidity hoisted onto others and society in general under the guise of being high-minded is beyond infuriating.
Enter Jeff Garlin, who apparently is a “comedian,” although most comedians are both funny and actually known by people other than their families. Having Googled this moron, I admit that I did recognize his face, but was so enraged by his words that I couldn’t concentrate on anything else.
Garlin has been in such appallingly bad TV shows as “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” and the short-lived “The Goldbergs,” so his body of work is undeniably atrocious. But I’m not here to attack the man’s career, such as it is, for there’s no need for me to stoop to such levels when the very words he has the audacity to utter are so appalling that they must be repudiated loudly and clearly.
In a recent interview Garlin spoke out against the "sexualization" of young stars such as Selena Gomez and Ariana Grande saying, "this is disgusting it's happening so young…Both beautiful girls, really beautiful girls, but they have baby fat. They look like kids," he said. For the record, Garlin said he's "all for ladies in bikinis," and by the time Gomez is 30 "she'll be ridiculous."
For the record, Selena Gomez is 22 and Ariana Grande is 21.
I have no problem with Mr. Garlin personally not being attracted to these ladies or anyone else. Nor would I take from him any legitimate feelings of personal “ickyness” he has when he sees either, or any other woman of the same age, dressing and/or acting provocatively. All things, ultimately, related to sexuality and attractiveness are, by definition, subjective and he can feel however he wants.
What he can’t be allowed to do is the exact thing he did in this interview, which was to make clear that he was not talking about his own personal feelings in a casual way since he once worked with Selena Gomez when she was younger. Rather, he was preaching from on high about how disgusting the entire process was and anyone who engaged in the process was equally as disgusting.
Where to begin with this cretin? For starters, in terms of abject physical beauty, I can think of few other times in a woman’s life when she is ever going to be more physically prone to being as close to perfect as she’ll ever be than in her early 20’s. As women mature and gain other attributes such as confidence, they become attractive in wholly different and more complete ways, but to take away from any woman the ability to flaunt what she’s proud to have at any time in her life is despicable. Why he is not being called out for a clear anti-woman sentiment is unclear to me, other than the fact that he’s Jeff Garlin and no one gives a shit. What’s next, Jeff? Should women also “know their place?” Asshole.
Let’s also make very clear that these are WOMEN we are talking about, and it’s not like they just turned 18, either. If you don’t like it, don’t look. If you have a personal relationship with either one of them and are bothered by how they’re behaving, speak to them directly and privately, but have the decency to keep your untalented mouth shut in public, rather than demeaning them, any other woman their age who chooses of their own free will to engage in such totally legal behavior, or anyone who finds it attractive.
And what of his claim that women in bikini’s are fine once they reach the age of 30. Did I just wake up in Saudi Arabia? How are these comments not being equated to oppressive cultures across the globe who tell women to cover up in various forms so that they don’t sexualize themselves or bring shame to the family, et al? Oh, that’s right, Jeff Garlin said them. What do you suppose would have been the reaction if the exact same phrases would have been uttered by Rush Limbaugh or Howard Stern or Bill O Reilly?
In an age where we’re told female celebrities who have their nude selfies stolen from the hacked cloud are victims of sexual assault, it’s stunning that a douchebag is allowed to degrade women clearly confident, proud and/or at the very least willing to sexualize themselves for reasons of personal enjoyment, career advancement or anything in between.
Using Garlin’s alleged logic, no one of Grande’s or Gomez’s own age should even find them attractive since they look like kids and have baby fat. And clearly no one older can find them attractive either, so I assume he’d like to raise the age of consent to 30 as well?
He also stupidly said “This didn’t happen 30 years ago…the internet added the sexualization,” which is so provably false and stupid it almost warrants no response, but since I’m here, I’ll take the time. There is no doubt that the internet has heightened almost all things in our lives, both good and bad. From sex and porn to shopping and information, all the way to the ability to start a revolution in an oppressed country, the internet has enhanced or increased the likeliness of endless things. But to say that the internet “added the sexualization” of beautiful young women in their early 20’s is to deny fact. Women (and men) have been sexualizing themselves at this age (and younger) for all of modern history. To actually list off everyone from Madonna to Christie Brinkley and every apparent whore who had the bad judgment to show a little skin before the internet was invented is an abject waste of time. Much like watching anything Jeff Garlin has ever been in.
Attitudes and words like this cannot be ignored simply because they are uttered by foolish and anonymous people. Much like the galactically stupid people who claim that anyone attracted to a woman whose genital region is clean shaven is clearly a pedophile because only children are hairless, people as ignorant as this must be confronted, condemned and showed to be ignorant and dangerous beyond belief.