|
Congratulations!
You have finally landed on the one page on this entire site (and on the entire internet for that matter) that is purely without bullshit... my soapbox page. There are a lot of times during our show that, whether it's because of time constraints and other obligations, I don't always get to address some issues that I feel don't get the attention they deserve. There are even more times when I just don't feel like waiting until the show the next day to get some things off my chest. Thus, I have started the "Rob's Soapbox" page. If you have clicked on this page looking for someone to coddle your fragile sense of self-esteem, or tell you what you want to hear or to reinforce your outdated world view, then exit this page right now and go somewhere else. If you are in search of the last forum for reason and common sense left in the world, then sit back, relax, and enjoy. I make only one promise with this soapbox page... if you read long enough and often enough, you will eventually be offended. So here's my latest soapbox. Listen up, 'cause you just might learn something... |
December 12th, 2005
ROB'S ANNUAL HOLIDAY GUIDE PART 4; A REAL LIFE LESSON IN TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR OWN HAPPINESS
I always write about how to take control of your own happiness, and throughout the years I have done so in my own life, perhaps never before more so than this year.
My wife and I invited 10 people to come to Thanksgiving dinner 2005. 8 said they would, 4 ultimately showed. The four missing persons called 7 days or less before Thanksgiving with "family issues."
So be it. We are not here to judge, and we believe that truly good friends (which we aspire to be) understand such situations arising. We also, however, understand that we are in total control of our happiness. Regardless of the reasons, our friends not being with us on Thanksgiving (after committing to do so) hit us hard this year. It's one thing to have people have other plans when we invite them in August, it's a whole different thing when we prep, plan and psyche ourselves up for people only to have them bail (again, regardless of the legitimacy of their reasons).
My wife and I believe that as you get older you have fewer friends, but better friends. Perhaps that's why Thanksgiving was so scarring this year. We judge our friends on the same moral barometer that we judge ourselves. Had we been in their shoes, we would have chosen different paths than they did. Once again so be it. They have to live their lives how they see fit, we, in turn have to choose our friends how we see fit.
Thanksgiving was fine, but not great. The food was amazing and the company we did have was welcome and fun. But the letdown was obvious amongst us all. The next day, my wife and I woke up and we were still wounded by our friends' inability to even make an appearance. It was one of those "we're done" moments. We had had it.
My wife and I give 6-8 parties per year and invite only the most elite of our friends. We offer great food, quality entertainment and a welcoming environment. We ask for nothing in return, only the loyalty of the people we call our friends. On the day after Thanksgiving, we just decided that we had had enough.
So, we cancelled Christmas. Not for ourselves, of course, but for others. Call us selfish, childish, rude, whatever you like. The point is that we decided to take control of our holiday happiness. We realized that we had to practice what I so often preach. By eliminating other people from our Holiday plans, we also eliminated any possibility of being disappointed, while not compromising our desire to have a fun, great holiday. This formula only works, of course, if you are blessed enough to be married to your best friend, as we are.
By the way, I'll accept selfish, because I have no problem with being selfish…in fact, happiness in life, in my opinion, requires a large amount of selfishness. Rude, however, is not an acceptable adjective to describe two people, united as one in marriage, putting themselves before all others in life. If you think it does, you truly have no concept about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
Back To Top
|
