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| Rob's Soapbox | ||
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Congratulations!
You have finally landed on the one page on this entire site (and on the entire internet for that matter) that is purely without bullshit... my soapbox page. There are a lot of times during our show that, whether it's because of time constraints and other obligations, I don't always get to address some issues that I feel don't get the attention they deserve. There are even more times when I just don't feel like waiting until the show the next day to get some things off my chest. Thus, I have started the "Rob's Soapbox" page. If you have clicked on this page looking for someone to coddle your fragile sense of self-esteem, or tell you what you want to hear or to reinforce your outdated world view, then exit this page right now and go somewhere else. If you are in search of the last forum for reason and common sense left in the world, then sit back, relax, and enjoy. I make only one promise with this soapbox page... if you read long enough and often enough, you will eventually be offended. So here's my latest soapbox. Listen up, 'cause you just might learn something... |
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April 24th, 2006 ANSWERS TO MAGGOT MAIL I am, by no possible stretch of anyone's imagination, a defensive person. I basically couldn't care less about 99.9% of people's opinions regarding anything in my life, so I essentially ignore all opinion-based comments regarding such. When it comes to my life I am, as our goofy President would say, "The Decider." I confidently choose my own happiness and therefore am in no need of outside opinion on those choices. Recently, my wife and I bought a new, beautiful home which had appraised at more than $1.1 million before we even moved in and began adding amenities to it which will ultimately increase its worth and value far beyond the money we invest into it. Having looked at dozens of homes on the markets and using my acute financial and negotiating skills, we paid just a smidgen more than $900,000 for the house so we are well ahead of the game as it is. Upon hearing that we were now living in a million dollar home, hundreds of listeners asked for photos, which went up last week and resulted in a confirmation of my thoughts of society in general. While there are still a few of us left who simply want to do the best we can in life and wish at least the same if not more for everyone else, the overwhelming majority of you are weak, jealous, ignorant, narrow-minded, unenlightened cowards who have decided that because you possess one or all of the previously mentioned attributes, you are going to go through life trying to tear others down, rather than build yourself up. To those of you who have written me positive notes or comments about the new home, I say thank you, but also ask that you spare your energy for your own personal endeavors. While I do genuinely appreciate the sentiment, I neither want nor need the affirmation, regardless of how sincere it is. Besides, those of us who "get" life need to stick together. To the other 99.9% of you, I have decided to write this column not for you, but for those who are standing on the sidelines. The fact of the matter is that your paltry, pathetic comments cannot and do not hurt me, nor do they change the fantastic life that my wife and I have worked so hard to create for ourselves. The game goes like this; you say "your house sucks," my wife and I laugh about it, open a $200 bottle of wine, share each others glorious company, perhaps with our amazing friends and pets, over a lobster dinner and wonder how your life can be so hollow. The next day we get up and do the same thing while you wallow in your own self loathing. Sounds to me like I win. This column is for those who are trying, legitimately trying to better themselves and achieve the next level of whatever it is that they define as their own personal contentment. My father always told me that as I went through life striving for the finest things that I could achieve I should always make sure to "be content, but never complacent." When I hear some of the horrible things being written by the maggot mailers I think of myself at the age of 22, having just purchased my first own home in Reno. It was a quaint little 1500 square foot house that I absolutely loved for one reason; it was mine and I had earned it. Yet, many of you write letters demeaning my current 4000 square foot house and I feel for those little 22 year old Rob's out there who are, perhaps, not in possession of enough personal worth or self esteem to allow your asinine comments to not bother them. I imagine the insecure 22 year old, moving into his or her own 1500 square foot home feeling on top of the world until they hear your shitty outlook on life, and then they are devastated because they think to themselves, "gee, if Rob's million dollar house is crap, then this rat-hole I just bought, that I thought was the greatest thing in my life, must really be awful." For those who are striving for their dreams at every turn in life, I offer this column and a few words of encouragement; remember that no one's opinion matters unless you decide that it does and that society does not dictate what makes you matter, you do. People will ALWAYS say horrible things about you because people are horrible. Insist on better in your life and remember to always strive for excellence and achieve perfection. Here now, are some of my favorite comments about my new home and my attempts at response that will hopefully be uplifting to those who could be wounded by them:
1) "This is your Idea of a Dream Home?" No, not at all, and I never claimed it was. First of all, my dream home would be nowhere near Sacramento, a city I tolerate for professional purposes only. This is merely the next level of greatness for me on my personal journey which will culminate with achievements and things you can't even fathom.
2) "Million Dollar homes are nothing… you're just normal." Saying ignorant things doesn't make them true. Only 1 of every 100 homes in America is a "million dollar home" and only 70% of American's even own a house. Additionally, the annual study of American wealth was released last week revealing that in a nation of 285 million people, only 8.3 million of us have net worth's of $1 million or more. If you define 3% of the population as "normal" you are either delusional or a failure at mathematics.
3) "That's no big Deal; there are plenty of bigger and better houses than yours." No shit, Sherlock. I am always the first to say that you'd best go through life recognizing that someone will always have more than you, make more than you, and know more than you. Chasing the holy grail of happiness is a recipe for depression. If we define our own personal successes on the fact that someone else has something bigger, we will never ever be happy. How awful would that be? My new house does not compare to thousands of homes in this crappy city alone, let alone other places but it's the nicest home I've ever owned and it's more than the overwhelming majority of people on this Earth will ever even dream of having. I am right on schedule with my plan for life happiness, how are you doing?
Neither does $3.50 at Starbucks. At least I have the million to spend.
5) "If you really had money, you'd have bought a bigger, better place." People who have money and have earned it get to that position in life through savvy earning, investing and spending. While my wife and I could easily have afforded a home far more expensive than what we bought, that would be a foolish allocation of our finances. Intelligent money managing demands diversification and discipline. Since this is just a step on the full journey towards our version of world domination, we bought what was appropriate while maintaining our positions in other pieces of property, stocks and other investments. Now is not the time to cash in so that we can buy a giant home in a crappy city.
While there were countless more crazy comments, those were the ones that stick out at this time. I have a feeling there might be a part 2 next week, because God knows there's no shortage of maggots out there.
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