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| Rob's Soapbox | ||
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Congratulations!
You have finally landed on the one page on this entire site (and on the entire internet for that matter) that is purely without bullshit... my soapbox page. There are a lot of times during our show that, whether it's because of time constraints and other obligations, I don't always get to address some issues that I feel don't get the attention they deserve. There are even more times when I just don't feel like waiting until the show the next day to get some things off my chest. Thus, I have started the "Rob's Soapbox" page. If you have clicked on this page looking for someone to coddle your fragile sense of self-esteem, or tell you what you want to hear or to reinforce your outdated world view, then exit this page right now and go somewhere else. If you are in search of the last forum for reason and common sense left in the world, then sit back, relax, and enjoy. I make only one promise with this soapbox page... if you read long enough and often enough, you will eventually be offended. So here's my latest soapbox. Listen up, 'cause you just might learn something... |
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November 3rd, 2008 WAKING UP TO YOUR MOUTH TAPED SHUT By the time most people read this column, two potentially earth-moving events will have already occurred. On November 4th, 2008, America will elect a new president. If we are to believe all of the polls and hype, the first African American president in the nation’s history, Barack Obama, will be anointed our new leader and hope and change will rule the day. At the same time, while America and the world are fixated on the election on that Tuesday, the Supreme Court of the United States will be hearing a case involving the power of the Federal Communications Commission to censor television and radio broadcasters as it applies to potentially offensive and/or indecent speech. The two events are not unrelated. Whoever is elected president will also appoint the new head of the FCC. Historically, the chairman of the FCC, at the direction of the President of the United States, dramatically influences how the commission behaves. Democrats like Barack Obama have traditionally taken a much more reasonable, passive, laissez-faire approach to issues of indecency and offensive speech, believing and endorsing the idea that there is no right to be offended in America. Under the Clinton administration, the FCC was stunningly tolerant of “shocking” speech as it related to issues of sex, bodily functions and excrement. In comparison, the idea that today any radio show could interview a porn star, for example, is laughable. It would never happen. For the past eight years under the Bush administration and FCC chairman Kevin Martin (A radical, right wing Christian whacko), a stunning blanket of censorship has been thrown upon radio and television, drastically limiting, controlling and in some cases eliminating the ability of broadcasters and shows to joke about, discuss or even reference anything remotely related to body parts and poop. The Republicans have a long history of being sticks-in-the-mud when it comes to the human body, most notably symbolized by Bush’s former attorney general John Ashcroft literally covering up the breasts on the Spirit of Justice statue that is a fixture in the Great Hall of the Department of Justice. Imagine the ironic hypocrisy of the most powerful law enforcement official in America draping the breasts of a statue that symbolizes justice in a nation founded on freedom of speech. If it weren’t so damn scary it would be hysterical. Lest you think this column is some sort of condemnation exclusively of the whack jobs on the far right in America, allow me to dispel your misconceptions by pointing out the raving lunacy of the Democratic Party as it relates to free speech. While the party of Obama seems to endorse and even encourage pee-pee and ka-ka jokes, they don’t tolerate dissenting points of view. As long as you say you love Obama, you are welcome to tell a joke about a baby being raped by a singing goat and no one will wave a finger at you; if, however, you have the audacity of hope to criticize the policies of the Democratic Party in even the most polite, clean way, you are to be silenced. Thus brings us what is called “the fairness doctrine,” an asinine piece of legislation literally akin to the types of dictatorial silencing we see occurring in places like Venezuela. The sales pitch on the fairness doctrine is simple and obvious; fairness. The truth, however, is much different. The fairness doctrine decrees, by law (in a nation founded on free speech, mind you) that dissenting opinions MUST be given equal time. Sounds FAIR, doesn’t it? The problem of course is that in a nation where speech is free, one is not required to provide a dissenting viewpoint. Those who dissent are already guaranteed the right to speak as they wish, whether or not anyone listens is beholden upon the speaker, their own individual talents to command an audience and whether or not their message resonates. There is not, in America a right to be heard. Any idiot can stand on the street corner and preach the bible, but no one has to listen and there in lies the dramatic difference between a right to speak and a right to be heard. Under the fairness doctrine, however, the government will demand that opinions are balanced by dissenting viewpoints on shows ranging from the likes of the Rob, Arnie and Dawn show all the way to the Rush Limbaugh show. Beyond that, the dirty little secret lies in the way “news” is both defined and presented. MSNBC will be allowed to continue to present its news in the most absurdly skewered fashion ever recorded because it will be defined as “news,” as opposed to comment. Meanwhile, when our show agrees that a child with a blue Mohawk should follow the rules and change his hair, we’ll be forced, by law, to provide a dissenting viewpoint were the fairness doctrine to be enforced literally. Such ideas are madness beyond the pale. The impetus of the fairness doctrine is not, however, to silence shows like ours. It is, sadly, to silence what has become known as “talk radio,” dominated by conservative hosts ranging from Limbaugh to Sean Hannity and everyone in between. The reason shows like these gather such enormous audiences (and it is staggering to see the stunning success of almost every single fairly eloquent conservative that has a radio show ranging from Laura Ingraham to Dennis Miller) is because they fill a void and provide a service to a large percentage of the population. Hard line conservatives in America have long felt that their viewpoint was not represented by the likes of the New York Times, 60 minutes and the NBC Nightly News (and it’s hard to argue with that opinion if you choose to be objective) and they have gravitated to such differing voices as provided by talk radio. And what’s wrong with that? Apparently in Barack Obama’s world, the thing that’s wrong with that is that dissenting voices might, perhaps, educate some people as to why they should decide for themselves that he and his party are abject idiots. Such conclusions are intolerable, so in the same vein as Castro, Chavez, Putin and all other dictators across the globe today, they shall silence their critics. Unthinkable in America, one would hope and think, yet not quite unbelievable, sadly. So forgive me if I reserve the right to say that “I told you so,” come the morning that you wake up and free speech has been silenced by either of the political parties. Either we will be forced to be ashamed and embarrassed of our own bodies by never discussing them, or we will be forced to silence our criticisms of sitting government leaders; while one sounds trite and the other chilling, I see no distinction between the two. I have long been resigned to the fact that far too many Americans are ignorant and apathetic of their nation, but I have never gotten over the rage I feel when so many of you bitch about things that happen right under your noses. The constant whining of “when and how did this happen,” drives me nuts and falls upon deaf ears. You have been warned; if you care, then do something about it; if you don’t care, then in the spirit of where we are headed let me say this: I think Obama is great and go fuck yourself. ----- |
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