Wednesday October 25th, 2006

TOP 5 WORST THINGS ABOUT HALLOWEEN

Overview: Halloween is a horrible holiday that involves horrible children in horrible costumes. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Criteria: Wide open. Narrowing down the horribleness of the holiday is the real trick here.

Rob's Notes: No, I didn't have any bad experiences as a child on Halloween. In fact, I am not really why I hate Halloween so much but I do, probably because it empowers children when they should be doing chores or studying… little rats.

Arnie's Notes: You Goddamn people and your made up holiday. You go to work to work, not to look like a damn idiot!!!!!!!!!! You don't get paid because you look like Randy Jackson from American Idol, do your JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As far as kids trick or treating, they are nothing more than terrorist that if they don't get what they want something bad will happen to your house, nice, way to go terrorist trainers!!!!!!!!!

Rob's Top 5

5. Adults who dress up to stay at home and hand out candy

4 Urban legends of razor blades in candy…it never happened, so stop x-raying your kids candy

3. The bastardization of the English language with sales that are "spook-tacular."

2. Dressing up pets. It's cruelty to animals

1. The empowerment of children via trick or treating, essentially teaching them that home invasions are ok.

HONORABLE MENTION

People who call it "Harvest Day"

Arnie's Top 5

5. Decorations in yard

4. The news, and news anchors trying to be scarry.

3. People that X-Ray their kids candy.

2. Kids trick or treating

1. People that dress up at work.